“Moreover, if your brother commits a sin against you, go and show him his fault — but privately, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won back your brother. If he doesn’t listen, take one or two others with you so that every accusation can be supported by the testimony of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to hear them, tell the congregation; and if he refuses to listen even to the congregation, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax-collector. Matthew 18:15-17
Today was interesting as the issue with my neighbor who has been making issues caught me in the hallway and came after me like we had to talk and kiss and make up. Not literally but figuratively. And I told her what I said before which is we have nothing to talk about, I told you the two things, not removing anything and redoing it to spend foolish money. And second, to stay out of my business with other people.
The real issue is the second point, because she is getting involved with other peoples deals with me, I told her to stay out. She did not and kept sending me texts over and over, which I ignored, never answered them, because it is none of her business. I was not mean or angry or anything, just did not want it to go anywhere like it does when you engage. She wanted me to engage and will not respect my wishes or leave me alone.
So she could not accept it and attacked me over and over, to which I simply said again, we have nothing to discuss. I was just trying to set the boundaries of what is acceptable. I personally do not see why it is so difficult for her to accept? Which by the way my flesh wanted to engage especially when she changed the points to things about my daughters. But I kept quiet except to say please leave me alone.
But then she started to attack me even more, calling me a dictator, which she never gave reason why. Because how do you say that when I am simply setting some rules as to what she can and cannot do based on my vote and the vote of others. While allowing her to do as she sees fit with the approval of the other owners. We are a community and each of us has our say, and each of us has a difference of opinion of how we want it done. Granite I do have the majority of the vote because I own the most property, and it affects my pocket the most because I pay the most HOA fees. But if we do not agree with her idea and open my check book, then I am a dictator according to her. Has she ever thought she is trying to be a dictator and I am not letting her?
She also said something about our adopted daughters, do not remember exactly what it was, but it had to do with her feeling sorry for them because of dealing with me. She made a few other comments which were uncalled for. Including telling me how I was trying to take her condo away from her (as if I could). And how I hated her. There was one other crazy unrelated thing she accused me of which I do not remember as of now.
Then one of her neighbors who is a friend jumped in, and he made a comment about me being a christian, which I am not as you know if you read my post. I do not follow any religion, instead I follow the Lord Yeshua, the real son of God Adonai.
I cut off that conversation really quick by saying, so if I am christian, I am required to talk with her and cannot set boundaries? They did not have a comeback answer to that one.
The story continues and the rest of the conversation is not important other than over and over and over this lady tried to get me to engage with her, saying things that had nothing to do with anything, like my daughters and me being a dictator. Things to get your dandruff up and argue. But I did not engage, I simply said over and over that we have nothing to discuss, so please leave me alone. As said before, this is not easy as I wanted to engage and tell her how crazy she is with her comments and address each one. But I did not do that. And it gave me an amazing amount of power over the situation. Not that this is what I was looking for, but it is what happened. The other people cannot argue with you if you do not engage, they can only say crazy rediculous things.
Now to bring in the verse above, because it along with a number of other verses God showed me, came to mind. The first point is show me where it says in the bible we are to engage in conversation with people when they are dysfunctional like this? Like because we are christian we must talk and agree with them?
There is not anything like that in the bible. It does however tell us to act in the Spirit of Love, which the Love of God is summed up in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient and kind, not jealous, not boastful, not proud, rude or selfish, not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not gloat over other people’s sins but takes its delight in the truth. Love always bears up, always trusts, always hopes, always endures.”
So let’s apply this to the conversation, because I was patient and as kind as I could be while setting boundaries. No jealousy, I was not boasting, not proud. You could argue I was rude, but I was not trying to be, I was just setting boundaries, over and over and over. I was not angry nor am I now. Nor did I keep any records of wrongs, although I do know who she is and do not want to hang out with her. There is a slight difference with knowing what is in man and not wanting to deal with that dysfunction, and keeping records of their wrongs. It is a fine line!
Because on the other side the bible is clear that if we associate with people who want to remain in sin and dysfunction, it will affect us and we become guilty of their sin. If you engage with them you will either side with them, like the neighbors did. Or get mad and argue, which the argument resolves nothing because after it all she will be the same person.
What I also find with the neighbors and people in general is, if they agree with the other person, they support them. This neighbor wants to remove the same stairs so of course they supported her, and made it like I was very wrong to not engage with her and keep my distance and boundaries.
This ties in with the ongoing teachings of how the religions make people to believe these lies, like how we all have to just get along and be happy and let the demanding ones win. They use their religious views to try to get their way, a manipulation and lie. For example the other couple told me we had to remove the stairs because it is blocking their view and sent a picture. The stairs are barely in the picture and behind them is a white fence, so even if we removed the stairs they would see the white fence and not the ocean. I called them on their manipulation and lies as well.
Both of these couples are catholic, so it explains a lot because as stated many times I was born into the religion and practiced it until around 45. It is a religion of making you believe you are superior because you are the religion of God and Peter was the first pope. That is what they teach, but what they do not teach is what doctrine of Yeshua’s was that Peter taught, the doctrine of the church these days is almost all lies.
This couple has a picture of the Pope John Paul the second, but then they are from Poland. And a picture of Mother Teresa. I have had arguments or debates many times with catholics who will defend their saints and Mary and praying to them and bowing down to the statues of them and idolize them, even when the very first of the ten commandments says do not do that because God is a jealous God. They practice breaking the very first and most important commandment of God, the biggest sin in God’s eyes. And yet they practice it as if it is something special and important to God.
But I degrees a little, the point is how we hear things from our men teachers, and believe the lie. And then how that teaching or doctrine translates into sin and dysfunction. And a demanding spirit twisting things to where the one who is simply setting boundaries to not get caught up in the dysfunction is the one who is wrong. And the ones lying and twisting things to try to get their way, or be one of those noisy neighbors in everyone’s business when she should not be. These people have probably never read the bible and if they have they really do not know what it says. I remember a number of years ago when I first started to know the Lord and was reading the bible, I said something to my dad who then said something about not understanding the bible. Without the Spirit it is impossible to understand it, especially when your religion is lying to you about what God wants and who he is, and then you read something different, like idolizing saints and Mary.
So the problem is because I do know God and hear him and obey him, and he shows me the dysfunction in people and how to deal with it and them. And then you do it, they hate it. They hate the light, and prefer the men’s teaching which agree with their viewpoints. Which as mentioned many times is the judgment. You either let the light in you and change you through obedience or die in your sin to the pit of fire.
As a child of the living God, the one who wants you to know him and him you, you have to decide if you are going to do things the way they expect you to do them, or what you should do in the Lord? Which is to obey the light and keep the darkness away from you.
So back to the verse again, I did as it says, I went to her personally to make my point, she did not accept it and kept coming at me which I ignored. I have had other people who have heard her before, with her dysfunction and pointed out how she is wrong. I do not have a church to take it to, but I also would never take it to the catholic church with all its sinful doctrine. So in the end I did as it says, have nothing to do with them.
This does not mean I will not say hi when I see them, but I will not engage, cut the conversations short and move on. Which by the way is what Yeshua did with Pilot when he was crucified, he remained silent, kept his responses short. There is a serious power in doing this, the people do not like it. When you are quiet they have nothing to come back on you with. As it says in Proverbs in different ways, even a foolish man seems wise when he keeps his mouth shut. And it also talks a lot about dealing with foolish men, it is even written do not throw your pearls to the swine!
By the way I had issues with another one of our owners, and confronted him as well. He got it and we now talk regularly, even today. He accepted my boundaries and did not try to get me to engage in a dysfunctional argument to get his way. And I did not make him do anything my way either. It is a relationship of respect or the Love of God which is patient, kind…